One of the greatest lectures I’ve heard is to love yourself before you love somebody else. One question I had in mind was, am I worth loving? I was in doubt all along. I too cannot even think of how I can be loved, I hate myself for the record. A friend of mine said, to love someone you must feel good about yourself, feel complete and whatnot. Will I ever be complete? What if I tell you that the only one who can complete me is the one I love? So what’s the sense? How can you make yourself complete on your own? Is it faith? Happiness? Or the balance of both happiness and sadness? How? Even right now I am still in shock people noticed that I do not love myself as much as some people do.
That no matter what I do, I cannot let my guard down. I wonder if this is a facadel, to hide all my imperfections, to cover up with how wrong I am. For the betterment of the situation, I love myself that no one can ever imagine. There are times that I feel content just from within.
Every couple I’ve met in the past seems so happy with how they are, they were. How was their relationship? I bet it was not perfect but splendid. Loving is happiness, well I am not happy; so can I be loved? I need someone who can fill in through the spaces of my fingers, to hug and to hold. I need someone there for me always, and by always I meant forever.
I want to love, give myself to the world, experience to be hurt and that eternal happiness that love can bring. In my existence I want to be with someone worth gasping for air, worth my affection and my never ending care. This is my story, a man who wants to love while he’s incomplete.
The typical guy who said that relationship is not for him but in the long run asks for more than love itself.